Change is scary…

Several years ago, I was working as an executive administrative assistant at an amazing non-profit organization. Even though I had been in the organization for several years, about 6 months into this position, I was ready for a career change, so I pulled up my resume. As I began working on it, I noticed a pattern: every year and a half or two years, I was in a new position, either it was a lateral move or a promotion, but it was a change. Then it hit me: I have commitment issues! I had previously managed a team and took concern when someone didn’t have job stability. I argued with myself and defended myself since I was only in my second place of employment… I just worked my way around and up…no biggie…

I struggled with that thought for a while and I finally made an appointment with a counselor. In the course of about 4-6 sessions we uncovered the truth: I need growth in my life. I need to be challenged. I need to be moving towards something new. Instead of changing jobs, I decided to go back to school and finish my bachelor’s degree. BEST decision EVER! I still ended up switching jobs…about 3 more times before changing organizations. I’m on the second job at the new place, due to a promotion…. Maybe I do have some commitment issues… I mean, I’m still single… and somewhat ready to mingle… 

I’ve realized that as a single adult, it’s harder for growth to happen naturally. I don’t have husband or partner to challenge me, nor do I have children to force me into responsible adulthood… I don’t even have a dog! This has made me realize that I have to seek out opportunities for growth, either in my career, my social life or just a new hobby. 

By no means do I feel like I have arrived. I definitely have my times when I just stay the same. I close out the world around me and just sit still. I distance myself from my friends and loved ones and lay low. We all need a break from life sometimes. But that’s never been a permanent state of mind for me. In due time, the moment comes and goes and I seek out the next new chapter. Change brings it challenges,  change brings pain, change brings relationships to an end, but it also brings life, passion and freedom. 

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